Thursday, June 28, 2012

Do You Love Me?

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Remember not the former things, nor consider the things of old. Behold, I am doing a new thing; now it springs forth, do you not perceive it? I will make a way in the wilderness and rivers in the desert.
Isaiah 43:18 

I heard this read on the radio once back in Ohio and I hate to admit that I had to pull over to cry.. ok ok.. uncontrollable sobbing is more like it. (You had to be there!). I can't remember what was going on in my life that this hit me so hard but it did.. and I told everybody I saw about it for weeks.. I don't think any further introduction is needed... 

The Pearl Necklace
Author unknown

The cheerful girl with bouncy golden curls was almost five. Waiting with her mother at the checkout stand, 
she saw them: a circle of glistening white pearls in a pink foil box. 
"Oh please, Mommy. Can I have them? Please, Mommy, please!"

Quickly the mother checked the back of the little foil box and then looked back into the pleading blue eyes of her little girl's upturned face.
"A dollar ninety-five. That's almost $2.00. If you really want them, I'll think of some extra chores for you and in no time you can save enough money to buy them for yourself. Your birthday's only a week away and you might get another crisp dollar bill from Grandma."
As soon as Jenny got home, she emptied her penny bank and counted out 17 pennies. After dinner, she did more than her share of chores and she went to the neighbor and asked Mrs. McJames if she could pick dandelions for ten cents.
On her birthday, Grandma did give her another new dollar bill and at last she had enough money to buy the necklace.
Jenny loved her pearls. They made her feel dressed up and grown up. She wore them everywhere--Sunday school, kindergarten, even to bed. The only time she took them off was when she went swimming or had a bubble bath. Mother said if they got wet, they might turn her neck green.
Jenny had a very loving daddy and every night when she was ready for bed, he would stop whatever he was doing and come upstairs to read her a story. One night when he finished the story, he asked Jenny, "Do you love me?"
"Oh yes, Daddy. You know that I love you."
"Then give me your pearls."
"Oh, Daddy, not my pearls. But you can have Princess--the white horse from my collection. The one with the pink tail. Remember, Daddy? The one you gave me. She's my favorite."
"That's okay, Honey. Daddy loves you. Good night." And he brushed her cheek with a kiss.
About a week later, after the story time, Jenny's daddy asked again, "Do you love me?"
"Daddy, you know I love you."
"Then give me your pearls."
"Oh Daddy, not my pearls. But you can have my babydoll. The brand new one I got for my birthday. She is so beautiful and you can have the yellow blanket that matches her sleeper."
"That's okay. Sleep well. God bless you, little one. Daddy loves you." And as always, he brushed her cheek with a gentle kiss.
A few nights later when her daddy came in, Jenny was sitting on her bed with her legs crossed Indian-style. As he came close, he noticed her chin was trembling and one silent tear rolled down her cheek.
"What is it, Jenny? What's the matter?"
Jenny didn't say anything but lifted her little hand up to her daddy. And when she opened it, there was her little pearl necklace. With a little quiver,she finally said, "Here, Daddy. It's for you."

With tears gathering in his own eyes, Jenny's kind daddy reached out with one hand to take the dime-store necklace, and with the other hand he reached into his pocket and pulled out a blue velvet case with a strand of genuine pearls and gave them to Jenny. 

He had them all the time. He was just waiting for her to give up the dime-store stuff so he could give her genuine treasure.
What are you hanging on to?

Wow those words "what are you hanging on to?" turned my life upside down that day! It made me really think, and ask God to search me, and help me release the things that I was holding on to. things that where hindering God from being able to bless me with the genuine treasure. 

As a mother I only want what is best for my children, because I love them so much! My heart aches when I watch them settle for less. So I can only imagine how my Heavenly Father longs to bless us with the best.. but we continue to hold on the the dime store stuff.. what are we holding on to...

Our will... over His?
Our dream... over the dreams and desires He has designed us for?
A relationship we know we should not be in... over the real love He has in store for us?
A friendship we should let go off that may be holding us back... Over His plans?
A job that we hate.. when he has a better one in store?
Material things we think make us happy... over the true joy He has for us?

LET IT GO AND LET GOD!!! Whatever it is that we are holding on to let it go!! He wants nothing more than for us to say "Lord it is yours and whatever you have in store for me I want it.. I accept it, over what I feel I should have!".  

But even through all this, this is what God is really asking is: 
Do you Love ME? 
Do you trust me?
Do you not have faith?
Do you believe in me?

Do you love Him enough to let go! If you haven't let go yet He is waiting. just like the father in the story He still loves her and sweetly kisses her goodnight.. all while secretly holding on to that box in his pocket waiting for the moment when she said YES I LOVE YOU ENOUGH TO LET IT GO! 

Wow! I pray this moves you to evaluate yourself. And I am praying that if you find something... that you will be able to let it go. God Bless you..

please comment, and share this post! God bless you! 


Sunday, June 24, 2012

Music that moves me..

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 They shall lift up their voice, they shall sing;

For the majesty of the Lord

They shall cry aloud from the sea

Isaiah 24:14

For those of you who really know me, you know that I love music!!  I don't know if it came from being a dancer, because I was exposed to all types of music through it, but either way I love music. So I thought why not share some of it with you, and maybe share with you why some of that may be good or bad for our children and us..

Now if you are a music lover like me, you probably experience the same music timeline I do..

YOU  KNOW.....  the timeline where you can go back and trace what songs you were listening to during what era or period of your life.. Here's a few examples

  • How I would Jam and sing into my brush when Mirah Carey's "Someday" first came out. I was about 12 or 13..
  • How I would listen to Marc Anthony's old school music with my HS besties around 1996 in the dark and turn it up really loud!!
  • How my collage room mate would listen to a greek pop artist she loved, or, she would have Titanic's "My Heart Will Go On" because after seeing the movie she decided she was going to be an actress.When she wasn't around I would listen to Celin Dions "To Love You More" on repeat!
  • How I was listening to Mya's "Fear of Flying" in the car on the day of my first date with my husband.

I have hundreds of these.. but I have to guard my heart and the hearts of my children. What I mean by that is, I can't listen to 90% of the music I use to listen too anymore. Because attached to the music are certain feelings. Sometimes, usually when I am in a restaurant or shopping and I hear and old song.. I realize I will start singing it with out even thinking about it, and all of a sudden I am back to that time in my life. Remembering the feelings attached to that period of my life are there as well. Crazy I know... But there is sooo much more to this. I mean it, I can go on and on when it comes to this subject. But I can only graze the surface on it here, or this would be the longest post ever.

So why do we have to guard ourselves... well here are just 2 of the reasons..

#1. I as a child of the most High God, I am a different person now. I am renewed, so why would I want to reminisce of a time where I was not in the will of God, and living an ungodly life. I don't know about you but I can't go back there! To take it a step further.. if it doesn't glorify God, it's secular music therefore it is glorifying the world and we do not belong to this world but to His Kingdom!

#2. If we know we should not listen secular music why would we want to expose our children to it?
Most secular music talks about heartbreak/"breaking up", an ungodly lifestyle, drinking, drugs, pre-marital sex, and so on. SO why allow our children to hear these things.. just as we speak life into them.. this music also plants a seed that these things are ok. Nothing warms my heart than to hear my kids sing songs that worship God and glorify Him, and trust me on occasion where they do here something secular they are full of questions as to why they are singing certain things.. Children are listening and the are very aware of what is being said. 

What is the conclusion then? I will pray with the spirit, and I will also pray with the understanding. I will sing with the spirit, 
and I will also sing iwith the understanding.
1Corinthians 14:15

I must be honest and admit I was one of those teens growing up who though adults where crazy when they tried to explain this to me. However My role models  at the time were all guilty of this too. But now that I have a personal relationship with my Heavenly Father I understand.. think what you may, I know it sounds old school.. but it is... it's in the bible.. do the research. I dare you.

Please if you have any questions Please Please Please ask! No question is silly! I was once there and had to do my own research and I praise God I had the Bible and the resources to help me though it. email me if you need to at

So now I want to share with you some of the music that has touched my life in someway.. So in other word my New Music Time line... enjoy!

Everlasting Love When I first surrendered my life this song gave me hope.
How He Loves by Jesus Culture I mean whats not to love about this.. HE LOVES US REJOICE!!
Open Up the Sky by Deluge I want nothing but Him.
 Waiting Here For you by Christy Nockels  What a voice!
Make Me An Answer  by Ricardo Sanchez A call to Ministry.
Moving Forward by Ricardo Sanchez Who would ever want to go back after listening to this!
My Nation Healed by Ricardo Sanchez and Israel Houghton Not much of a video but close your eyes and just listen you will never be the same!
Broken Man By Unspoken These Guys are awesome! If you ever get the chance to see them live the are amazing!!
I've Got Joy by Unspoken Love their grove it's like no other!!!!
The Healing Has Begun by Matthew West Song he wrote on the topic of abortion. For women who have had one. I was listening to this when God told me it was time.. Time to glorify Him with my testimony. 
Come In My Courts by Deluge He calls us to worship and bask in His presence
Mesjesty (Here I Am) by Delirious Moves me
Heart of Worship by Tasha Cobbs Worship
Amazing God by William Murphy III Love, Love, Love this!

 “The Lord was ready to save me;
Therefore we will sing my songs with stringed instruments
All the days of our life, in the house of the Lord.”

                                                              Isaiah 38:20

Honestly I could go on and on, these are just a few but ENJOY!!

Friday, June 22, 2012

Answering the Call

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In his heart a man plans his course, but the LORD determines his steps. 
Proverbs 16:9

Wow!! It's officially summer. It has been a year since my family made the move to Florida. I still look around sometimes and wonder how on earth I got here, every once in a while I see a palm tree and it hits me all over again. As soon as it does I still have a  plethora of feelings that hit me.. Homesickness... (if thats even a word) I miss my wonderful family and friends. Then a moment of realization where I think of everything we have been through this last year.. then excitement because I have Gods word.. and the word He gave us about why He called us in FL.. for ministry. 
Sooooo I sat and waited for a little while waiting for God to just hit me over the head with what it is that He wanted me to do. (Silly I know, but seriously I can't be the only who has ever done that!!). As I dove into Gods word searching for a map He began to reveal things to me that that he had already revealed but I guess I had forgotten. In my very first post (Click here to read it!) I shared a small part of my testimony with you. I also shared that my Heavenly Father showed me that my child's death would not been in vain and that I would glorify Him with this.  Of course I still have my moments when I still want to plead with God and I beg Him to let me keep this hidden. 

It is of the Lord's mercies that we are not consumed, because his compassions fail not.
They are new every morning: great is thy faithfulness.
Laminations 3:22-23 

There is a reason that His mercies are new everyday.. Then I have the moments of clarity that reveals His plan, and my testimony is so much greater than me. So I take a deep breath pray and take another step. 

So I know I have been MIA from the blog for a little while. May was an awesome month where we focused on My other Blog, one that I do with  a dear friend Light For A Woman's Path. But I have been taking notes and there is so much I have to share with you! 

So in the last month I have had several meetings with different organizations and ministries. I am currently training to become a counselor at a pregnancy center, and the training has been mind-blowing! I consider it a privilege that God would choose to use me.. of all people, in this way.  Next month I will also be completing training to lead Post- Abortive woman through the same counseling I went through, and to publicly speak about my child. I have the honor of being used by God to introduce the love and forgiveness that is available to them through the blood of the Lamb. 

I am blessed to have met amazing people and mentors in this process.. and blessed with an incredible support system that God has provided that spans from Ohio to Florida and New York to Texas!!  I also get to see my children begin to stand on Gods word too. To hear my beautiful daughter pray for the end to abortion. I get to see my oldest stand tall next to me because he knows the pain and has seen my tears and he understands Gods plan. I am Honored to have such a supportive husband who with the grace of God was able to see through my past and has accepted Gods call to protect me and Love me even on my rough days. I also have a little guy who may not fully understand why I cry sometimes, but who God has given the ability to sit in my lap wipe my tears away and tell me I am beautiful even when I have my  Rudolph red nose. 

So now I ask you.. what is it that God has spoken to you.. What is it that He has called you to? Now if your sitting and waiting for God to hit you over the head.. stop!! There are hurting people in this world who need to hear your testimony now, or who are waiting to hear something that only you can say!
Remember that for some people out there we will be the only bible they ever read!!!  God is calling you all to be Jesus with skin on, we have the Holy Spirit living in us.. and we have the advantage of knowing how the book ends!! :) can you imagine if we all answered that call!

Now if you are unsure if your hearing from God test yourself!! 

1. Does it exalt Christ? (John 16:14)
2. Is it Scriptural? (Proverbs 30:5-6)
3. Do other Christians confirm it? (Proverbs 15:22)
4. Does it produce good fruit? (John 15:1-16
5. Does God bring it to pass? (Isaiah 55:10-11)

I may elaborate more on this in a future post ;)